Sunday, March 29, 2015

Midway Island





North East of Hawaii, the ocean currents form a giant whirl pool of debris from around the Pacific, the scientific name is called the North Pacific Gyre. It’s one of the largest ecosystems on Earth, comprising of millions of square kilometres.
Today it’s better known as “The Great Garbage Patch,” an area the size of Queensland, Australia where there is approximately one million tonnes of plastic spread throughout the ocean. Drag a net in any area of this part of the ocean and you will pick up toxic, discarded plastic.
Photographer Chris Jordan has documented this phenomenon.
I had been studying for quite a while the phenomenon called the Pacific garbage patch. I was looking for a way to visualize it, it was really surreal to land on Midway, seeing that my worst hopes of what I would find there are true. These are all albatross chicks, hatched out of their eggs and the very first meal they got was deadly to them. What happens is, when the eggs hatch one of the parents goes out and flies looking for food. They search over this vast area of the pacific and when they come back with is a belly full of toxic plastics, and they feed that to their babies. They die of starvation, malnutrition and chocking. Simply allow yourself to feel whatever it is you feel about this, without jumping to the way to solve it. Because I think we really need to feel these things, even if the feelings are uncomfortable, because those are the feelings that will turn into the fuel and drive passionate action – Chris Jordan
The desire to change these things will put the human race on a journey to do so, and we are in the midst of it. Ultimately it is our choice as to whether or not we take the time to educate ourselves about our choices and begin doing things in a manner that cares for our environment and home more than our materialistic needs.
What can we do about this problem now? As much as possible, support eco-friendly products. Avoid being wasteful and purchasing new products each time a new version comes out simply so we can be up to date with the latest greatest. Create awareness about this issue and pass it onto your friends and family. Awareness has been key in changing various aspects of our world and so often we give it little credit. It is much more powerful than we think.

Saturday, March 21, 2015

I needed this.

Somehow I knew today was going to be great before it even started. I even considered bailing at the last minute. Last night, even. (I'm an introvert.) I almost made up some bullshit reason to stay home. I didn't, though.

I rarely get to see my mother and sister and I regret that. I regret it even though it isn't my fault. We live on different sides of a very divisive mountain. My sister lives on the other side of a mountain that's further still. We also just move in different circles.

I wanted this day though. I asked for it. I needed it. Partly because, since my accident, whether I was really aware of it or if I wasn't, I was slowly withdrawing further into myself and a part of me knew deep down I needed to stop it. I was climbing into my own head because I had nothing else to distract me. On the other hand, because of my accident, I'm so fucking thankful to be alive now. I'm aware of everything. I feel everything. I need everyone I love to know that I DO love them and want them around. I always had a habit of estranging myself, like some fucked up defense mechanism. I don't care about any of that passive aggressive shit anymore. I very well should have died that day, but for some reason, I didn't. I escaped with a few scrapes and a mildly burnt ear. I haven't been stopped yet. The sand I was given is still moving through that glass. Maybe that was the reason for all of this. The kiss I needed to stir me from sleep.

I think that's what kept me from bailing. We had a great time. We didn't really do much, just putzed around and went to some flea markets. We laughed. My sister and her friend gossiped about the people of that horrible town I left behind. It was enough to distract me from the fog I've been in. I was happy...but after it was all over, I was glad to be home. I get overwhelmed very easily and I need Babe to center me after being away. I'm more appreciative of him lately. I'm more appreciative period.

Sunday, March 15, 2015

oh, I LOVE this.



Why?

The events of the last week have left me in a very philosophical, reflective mood. Things happen. Bad things to good people. Good things to bad people. So on and so forth. It's the nature of things. Everything has a bigger picture. Every occurrence has ripples. A purpose. At first I was really pissed off. "How dare that fucking kid destroy my car? What the fuck is wrong with him? Why me?"

Maybe I'm dazed. Maybe I'm being nice about the whole thing when I ask "What if him hitting me was to cause a different chain of events in his life?" I don't know. I don't know why any of this is happening. I'm both afraid and curious to see what the aftermath of this will be. Only time will tell.

But still though. This has been a HUGE PAIN IN THE ASS.

Saturday, March 14, 2015

You were too good for this world, Priscilla

Haven't been as active on here as I'd like to be, but lately I have an excuse. I was in an accident last Sunday (March 8th) and my beautiful 2012 Chevy Cruze was totaled. Some dickhead kid ran his red light and t-boned the shit out of it. My heart is broken. BUT bright side, I'm ok other than a sore neck. I walked away from it. Everyone was amazed. This is short and to the point because I don't like talking about this but felt I needed to blog for some reason. I got a brand new 2014 Cruze LTZ today so everything is cool in the having a car department. Nothing will ever take my sweet Priscilla's place though. Not ever.


Thursday, March 05, 2015

my day.

I'm really bad at this.

Was supposed to go to work today. I didn't though, because it snowed a fuckton. I was homebound.

So I made cookies. Mass quantities.

I cleaned.

Watched TV.

Lost 8 hours of pay.

Tomorrow looks similar.